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snake-in-the-grass.com & get-over-it.org are under development... Snakes in the Grass LANGUAGE TRANSLATORS: by Gary G. Ballard, San Diego photojournalist, watchdog ethics blogger The best quote I heard about business advice as a young man came during the movie The Spanish Prisoner when Steve Martin’s scammer character said to the sucker:
Years later, I was discussing this philosophy with a respected mentor, a high-powered corporate creative officer (CCO), he said:
Somewhere between the two mind-sets lies the secrets to preventing one of life’s hardest lessons (unfairly getting screwed over) and ensuring its greatest rewards — a successful career, like a successful marriage, begins with picking the right people. So then how do honest hard-working "nice people" choose ethical partners — and not fall victim to scammers, liars, cheaters, backstabbers, haters, thugs, crooks, thieves, predators, bullies, abusers, users and losers? And just as important: How to spot bad people early on and get over being wronged?
He uses his money, intelligence and charisma to manipulate and win his victim's trust by appearing to be a trustworthy friend and mentor. For example, he offered up this remarkable observation to his mark:
So open your eyes and ears and pay attention to the warning signs! They may not be as obvious as a rattlesnake shaking its tail, but the consequences of blind faith, blind love and blind loyalty can be as sobering up to reality as venom oozing from a fresh snake bite. The shark mentality: In the movie dialog below, con man Jimmy Dell continues to feed the victim great mentoring advice about human nature in the real business world in a successful effort to win his trust so he could steal from him. Joe Ross had developed a valuable formula for his employer and thief Jimmy was setting him up to steal it from him:
The best lessons I've learned by personal experience about how to successfully read shady people, users and losers are:
So you may have to dig for information about how to access arrest records and such; simply adding "complaint" or "grievance" to an Internet search may hit key pieces of the human personality puzzle. ENTER DONALD J TRUMP for example:
Sorry, Mr. Trump, no offense, nothing personal, it's just most people on Earth can relate to you in this context. People of low moral character share some common traits we should be aware of: They believe if they repeat a lie often enough, and if it's big enough, it becomes truth (at least in their own minds). Their every conversation is "perfect" -- becomes a "witch hunt" if we challenge them with the law -- all evidence and fact checks are labeled "fake" and misrepresented to craft their false narratives. We may like the MONEY and ATTENTION and PRESTIGE -- even the CAUSE -- but God help us if we give these people our LOYALTY and TRUST (or fall in LOVE with them) because they will throw us under the bus and steal our property when we are no longer useful to them. These people only serve themselves -- they're born USERS and TAKERS with little concept of fair play or giving back. I'm not suggesting these types of people are all bad -- if they are useful to you -- I am saying the NAIVE may want to think twice before getting in bed with a rattlesnake....
1) Original large rattle "Snake In The Grass" art posters close-up. 2) "No, no, if you help me, you will be my best friend. I will treat you differently." 3) "If you don't check the grass for snakes it's hard to complain about being bitten."
WHAT GOES AROUND: My own hard luck story about getting screwed over -- and losing my career and retirement income -- is posted on my protest website: www.sycuanbandofthieves.com.
Hindsight is the greatest teacher after the fact, but you can never know someone's Spiritual character until they show their true colors. For example, a chameleon changes its colors to deceive others, and a snake in the grass bites you because he's a snake — it's in their DNA — it is the nature of the animal. SOMEONE IS BULLYING YOU OR STEALING FROM YOU? WHY? First, it is important to understand the psychological nature of Dishonesty | Bullying | Cheating | Victim Blaming | Corruption and Bad Faith because BAD PEOPLE shamelessly lie to and prey on nice people. Let's also be clear about Integrity | Fair Play | Honesty | Ethics | Morality and Good Faith because good people and the Rule of Law are society's protectors against life's scumbags. Okay, then how should good people react when dishonest or abusive people or corrupted company officials try to bully, cheat and intimidate them in the business world? With a family to support — or if you love your work and want to be able to earn a living doing it — the best advice would seem simple: You suck it up and move forward with tight lips and eyes fixed firmly on the goal.
On the other hand, you may be thinking about doing something crazy like asking someone for an explanation, speaking up for yourself to higher ups, writing a grievance letter, protesting on a public blog, filing a lawsuit, crawling under a rock and dying, or going after revenge — but beware — any one of these moves can be career suicide in unfair working environments and get the victim blacklisted regardless of clear and convincing evidence proving who's right or wrong. That would seem to be why legal disputes like wrongful termination, whistle-blower, race and age discrimination suits are so heavily weighted in the justice system, because they tend to destroy a person's psyche and livelihood. “In looking for people to (do business with), look for three qualities: integrity, intelligence, and energy. And if they don't have the first, the other two will kill you.” - Warren Buffett (Businessman, 1930-), (respectfully edited by G BALLARD) |
Great advice (if you can afford to take it), but I can’t help wondering if Bill got screwed and got over it, or the extent he screwed other people and was telling them to get over it. Even Steve Jobs’ (Apple cofounder) biography contains this paradox of cold-blooded ruthlessness to get ahead versus morally doing the right thing by his team members. Though Steve seemed pretty adamant about protecting HIS good name, HIS intellectual property, and his FAMILY money. So be aware: This mindset from two of the wealthiest, most successful business individuals in the history of our world and where they ended up in the end. |
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Hatred is like drinking poison and hoping it kills the other person.
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How a person fights back or deals with being wronged mostly depends on his or her personality and the backbone and morals their mother or father or guardian instilled in them as a child.
I can still hear my grandma telling me: “Forget those people, and let your hard work be your measure.” However, good measure doesn’t pay the rent or the hospital bills when your children get sick. |
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I think the key to successfully standing up to mean and immoral people or getting over it is understanding the hardball-games they play to better see through their clothes and better understand how they operate. This old legal aphorism was edited by G BALLARD - click on the graphic above for a free high-resolution law poster. |
| “Nothing is over until you decide to give up.”
- Captain Richard Phillips (Hostage of Somali pirates) |
| “Each of us is a book waiting to be written, and that book, if written, results in a person explained.”
- Thomas M. Cirignano, Author |
| “We must straighten our backs... A man can't ride you unless your back is bent.”
- Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr. (Activist, 1929-1968) |
| “If one does not do evil things in the daytime, one need not fear knocks on the door in the middle of the night.”
- Unknown |
| “Don't pee on my leg and tell me it's raining.”
- Judge Judy Sheindlin |
| “The common mistake that bullies make is assuming that because someone is nice that he or she is weak. Those traits have nothing to do with each other. In fact, it takes considerable strength and character to be a good person.”
- Mary Elizabeth Williams |
| “Don’t ever wrestle with a pig. You’ll both get dirty, but the pig will enjoy it.”
- Cale Yarborough (NASCAR driver, 1939) |
| “A man is not finished when he is defeated. He is finished when he quits.”
- Richard Nixon (37th US President 1913-1994) |
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However, sadly — for good, honest people trying to raise decent, hard-working children — the best lesson may center around:
Perhaps we CAN raise children to be too honest and forthright — but who wouldn't want an effective charismatic leader of low moral character to do the people's dirty work while they look the other way and reap the benefits? History and governments are full of such amoral characters. |
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“The ultimate tragedy is not the oppression and cruelty by the bad people but the silence over that by the good people.” - Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr. (Activist, 1929-1968) My point here is to first remind yourself of who you are, your roots. And second, don't waste your health and peace of mind worrying about people and things that no longer matter — let go of them — or they will surely destroy you from the inside. |
| “A false friend and a shadow attend only while the sun shines.”
- Benjamin Franklin (6th US president, 1706-1790) |
| “Keep away from people who try to belittle your dreams. Small people always do that, but the really great ones make you feel that you, too, can become great.”
- Mark Twain (Writer, lecturer, 1835-1910) |
| “I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination.”
- Jimmy Dean (Singer, 1928-2010) |
| “A stranger stabs you in the front; a friend stabs you in the back; a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends only poke each other with straws.”
- Unknown |
| “When people hurt you over and over, think of them like sandpaper. They may scratch and hurt you a bit, but in the end, you end up polished and they end up useless.”
- Chris Colfer (Actor, singer 1990-) |
| “Fear knocked at the door, Faith answered and nobody was there.”
- Unknown |
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“You are responsible for your life. You can't keep blaming somebody else for your dysfunction. Life is really about moving on.” - Oprah Winfrey (Business woman, 1954-) Of course no amounts of "wisdom" or clever maxims can ease your mind for long if you got seriously screwed over — only prayer and time and/or revenge can heal those kinds of wounds. |
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The top three greatest lessons I’ve learned the hard way about business @ I-GOT-SCREWED.ORG |
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WHERE DID THE INSPIRATION FOR THIS ARTICLE COME FROM? I wrote the lead to this ethics article many years ago, but I was only recently moved to finish and publish it trying to get over my own negative life experience. |
In The Spanish Prisoner It's the oldest con in the book, the snake-in-the-grass character (Jimmy Dell) again provides sage insight into the con-gamer's world. 
Just think about all the hard working people that allege he screwed them over in business -- it must be his crowning glory to flaunt his presidential victories in their faces, and their ultimate irony in life to be personally damaged by the President of the United States -- if he even remembers them at all beyond his victory dinner. 
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